You are so beautiful.
You are. You are so fucking unbelievably, absolutely beautiful.
From one of my favorite movies!! I love it and the crazy romance.
She truly is so f*cking beautiful too, maybe the most beautiful actress, in my opinion.
Rabu, 07 Desember 2011
Wednesday
You are so beautiful.
You are. You are so fucking unbelievably, absolutely beautiful.
From one of my favorite movies!! I love it and the crazy romance.
She truly is so f*cking beautiful too, maybe the most beautiful actress, in my opinion.
Wednesday
Sad but true.
I am sort of on-the-fence when it comes to this because I, like any parent, want to give my child the world! But it can get to be way too much. We kind of wrestled with the idea of buying this crazy touch-pad learning thing for Violet this Christmas but decided against it. She is 4!! She doesn't NEED all this expensive crap. And I never want to feel like she has to have it.
We have this friend W, this really cool roller-derby playing friend and she is the kind of Mom I aspire to be. She feeds her family only organic, wholesome foods and is amazing with her kids in general. Anyways, last year she showed everyone the pictures of the items she MADE for her children for Christmas. She didn't buy into the commercial crapola, like touchpads or barbie dolls or video games. She designed and crafted the coolest gifts and I am totally envious.
I guess I am in the middle on the gift thing -- I already tend to purchase Violet too much during the year anyways so Christmas is a day with even more "stuff" to fill the house.
Source
Selasa, 06 Desember 2011
Tuesday
A little Bikram humor on a Tuesday afternoon.
Yoga mat for sale. Used once at lunch hour class in December 2009. Usage timeline as follows:
11.45a—Register for hot yoga class. Infinite wisdom tells me to commit to 5 class package and purchase a yoga mat. I pay $89.74. Money well spent, I smugly confirm to myself.
11.55a—Open door to yoga room. A gush of hot dry air rushes through and past me. It smells of breath, sweat and hot. Take spot on floor in back of room next to cute blonde. We will date.
11.57a—I feel the need to be as near to naked as possible. This is a problem because of the hot blonde to my left and our pending courtship. She will not be pleased to learn that I need to lose 30 pounds before I propose to her.
11.58a—The shirt and sweats have to come off. I throw caution to the wind and decide to rely on my wit and conditioning to overcome any weight issues my fiancĂ©e may take issue with. This will take a lot of wit and conditioning.
11.59a—Begin small talk with my bride to be. She pretends to ignore me but I know how she can be. I allow her to concentrate and stare straight ahead and continue to pretend that I don't exist. As we finish sharing our special moment, I am suddenly aware of a sweat moustache that has formed below my nose. This must be from the all the whispering between us.
12.00p—Instructor enters the room and ascends her special podium at the front of the room. She is a slight, agitated Chinese woman. She introduces me to the class and everyone turns around to greet me just as I decide to aggressively adjust my penis and testes packed in my Under Armor. My bride is notably unfazed.
12.02p—Since I do have experience with Hot Yoga (4 sessions just 5 short years ago) I fully consider that I may be so outstanding and skilled that my instructor may call me out and ask me to guide the class. My wife will look on with a sparkle in her eye. We will make love after class.
12.10p—It is now up to 95 degrees in the room. We have been practicing deep breathing exercises for the last 8 minutes. This would not be a problem if we were all breathing actual, you know, oxygen. Instead, we are breathing each other's body odor, expelled carbon dioxide and other unmentionables. (Don't worry, I'll mention them later.)
12.26p—It is now 100 degrees and I take notice of the humidity, which is hovering at about 90%. I feel the familiar adorning stare of my bride and decide to look back at her. She appears to be nauseated. I then realize that I forgot to brush my teeth prior to attending this class. We bond.
12: 33p—It is now 110 degrees and 95% humidity. I am now balancing on one leg with the other leg crossed over the other. My arms are intertwined and I am squatting. The last time I was in this position was 44 years ago in the womb, but I'm in this for the long haul. My wife looks slightly weathered dripping sweat and her eyeliner is streaming down her face. Well, "for better or worse" is what we committed to so we press on.
12.40p—The overweight Hispanic man two spots over has sweat running down his legs. At least I think its sweat. He is holding every position and has not had a sip of water since we walked in. He is making me look bad and I hate him.
12.44p—I consider that if anyone in this room farted that we would all certainly perish.
12.52p—It is now 140 degrees and 100% humidity. I am covered from head to toe in sweat. There is not a square millimeter on my body that is not slippery and sweaty. I am so slimy that I feel like a sea lion or a maybe sea eel. Not even a bear trap could hold me. The sweat is stinging my eyeballs and I can no longer see.
12.55p—This room stinks of asparagus, cloves, tuna and tacos. There is no food in the room. I realize that this is an amalgamation of the body odors of 30 people in a 140 degree room for the last 55 minutes. Seriously, enough with the asparagus, ok?
1.01p—140 degrees and 130% humidity. Look, bitch, I need my space here so don't get all pissy with me if I accidentally sprayed you with sweat as I flipped over. Seriously, is that where this relationship is going? Get over yourself. We need counseling and she needs to be medicated. Stat!
1.09p—150 degrees and cloudy. And hot. I can no longer move my limbs on my own. I have given up on attempting any of the commands this Chinese chick is yelling out at us. I will lay sedentary until the aid unit arrives. I will buy this building and then have it destroyed. I lose consciousness.
1.15p—I have a headache and my wife is being a selfish bitch. I can't really breathe. All I can think about is holding a cup worth of hot sand in my mouth. I cannot remember what an ice cube is and cannot remember what snow looks like. I consider that my only escape might be a crab walk across 15 bodies and then out of the room. I am paralyzed, and may never walk again so the whole crab walk thing is pretty much out.
1.17p—I cannot move at all and cannot reach my water. Is breathing voluntary or involuntary? If it's voluntary, I am screwed. I stopped participating in the class 20 minutes ago. Hey, lady! I paid for this frickin class, ok?! You work for me! Stop yelling at everyone and just tell us a story or something. It's like juice and cracker time, ok?
1.20p—It is now 165 degrees and moisture is dripping from the ceiling. The towel that I am laying on is no longer providing any wicking or drying properties. It is actually placing additional sweat on me as I touch it. My towel reeks. I cannot identify the smell but no way can it be from me. Did someone spray some stank on my towel or something?
1.30p—Torture session is over. I wish hateful things upon the instructor. She graciously allows us to stay and 'cool down' in the room. It is 175 degrees. Who cools down in 175 degrees? A Komodo Dragon? My wife has left the room. Probably to throw up.
1.34p—My opportunity to escape has arrived. I roll over to my stomach and press up to my knees. It is warmer as I rise up from ground level - probably by 15 degrees. So let's conservatively say it's 190. I muster my final energy and slowly rise. One foot in front of the other. One foot in front of the other. Towards the door. Towards the door.
1.37p—The temperature in the lobby is 72 degrees. Both nipples stiffen to diamond strength and my penis begins to retract into my abdomen from the 100 degree temp swing. I can once again breathe though so I am pleased. I spot my future ex wife in the lobby. We had such a good thing going but I know that no measure of counseling will be able to unravel the day's turmoil and mental scaring.
1.47p—Arrive at Emerald City Smoothie and proceed to order a 32 oz beverage. 402 calories, 0 fat and 14 grams of protein -- effectively negating any caloric burn or benefit from the last 90 minutes. I finish it in 3 minutes and spend the next 2 hours writing this memoir.
3.47p—Create Craigslist ad while burning final 2 grams of protein from Smoothie and before the "shakes" consume my body.
4.29p—Note to self - check car for missing wet yoga towel in am.
Source
Yoga mat for sale. Used once at lunch hour class in December 2009. Usage timeline as follows:
11.45a—Register for hot yoga class. Infinite wisdom tells me to commit to 5 class package and purchase a yoga mat. I pay $89.74. Money well spent, I smugly confirm to myself.
11.55a—Open door to yoga room. A gush of hot dry air rushes through and past me. It smells of breath, sweat and hot. Take spot on floor in back of room next to cute blonde. We will date.
11.57a—I feel the need to be as near to naked as possible. This is a problem because of the hot blonde to my left and our pending courtship. She will not be pleased to learn that I need to lose 30 pounds before I propose to her.
11.58a—The shirt and sweats have to come off. I throw caution to the wind and decide to rely on my wit and conditioning to overcome any weight issues my fiancĂ©e may take issue with. This will take a lot of wit and conditioning.
11.59a—Begin small talk with my bride to be. She pretends to ignore me but I know how she can be. I allow her to concentrate and stare straight ahead and continue to pretend that I don't exist. As we finish sharing our special moment, I am suddenly aware of a sweat moustache that has formed below my nose. This must be from the all the whispering between us.
12.00p—Instructor enters the room and ascends her special podium at the front of the room. She is a slight, agitated Chinese woman. She introduces me to the class and everyone turns around to greet me just as I decide to aggressively adjust my penis and testes packed in my Under Armor. My bride is notably unfazed.
12.02p—Since I do have experience with Hot Yoga (4 sessions just 5 short years ago) I fully consider that I may be so outstanding and skilled that my instructor may call me out and ask me to guide the class. My wife will look on with a sparkle in her eye. We will make love after class.
12.10p—It is now up to 95 degrees in the room. We have been practicing deep breathing exercises for the last 8 minutes. This would not be a problem if we were all breathing actual, you know, oxygen. Instead, we are breathing each other's body odor, expelled carbon dioxide and other unmentionables. (Don't worry, I'll mention them later.)
12.26p—It is now 100 degrees and I take notice of the humidity, which is hovering at about 90%. I feel the familiar adorning stare of my bride and decide to look back at her. She appears to be nauseated. I then realize that I forgot to brush my teeth prior to attending this class. We bond.
12: 33p—It is now 110 degrees and 95% humidity. I am now balancing on one leg with the other leg crossed over the other. My arms are intertwined and I am squatting. The last time I was in this position was 44 years ago in the womb, but I'm in this for the long haul. My wife looks slightly weathered dripping sweat and her eyeliner is streaming down her face. Well, "for better or worse" is what we committed to so we press on.
12.40p—The overweight Hispanic man two spots over has sweat running down his legs. At least I think its sweat. He is holding every position and has not had a sip of water since we walked in. He is making me look bad and I hate him.
12.44p—I consider that if anyone in this room farted that we would all certainly perish.
12.52p—It is now 140 degrees and 100% humidity. I am covered from head to toe in sweat. There is not a square millimeter on my body that is not slippery and sweaty. I am so slimy that I feel like a sea lion or a maybe sea eel. Not even a bear trap could hold me. The sweat is stinging my eyeballs and I can no longer see.
12.55p—This room stinks of asparagus, cloves, tuna and tacos. There is no food in the room. I realize that this is an amalgamation of the body odors of 30 people in a 140 degree room for the last 55 minutes. Seriously, enough with the asparagus, ok?
1.01p—140 degrees and 130% humidity. Look, bitch, I need my space here so don't get all pissy with me if I accidentally sprayed you with sweat as I flipped over. Seriously, is that where this relationship is going? Get over yourself. We need counseling and she needs to be medicated. Stat!
1.09p—150 degrees and cloudy. And hot. I can no longer move my limbs on my own. I have given up on attempting any of the commands this Chinese chick is yelling out at us. I will lay sedentary until the aid unit arrives. I will buy this building and then have it destroyed. I lose consciousness.
1.15p—I have a headache and my wife is being a selfish bitch. I can't really breathe. All I can think about is holding a cup worth of hot sand in my mouth. I cannot remember what an ice cube is and cannot remember what snow looks like. I consider that my only escape might be a crab walk across 15 bodies and then out of the room. I am paralyzed, and may never walk again so the whole crab walk thing is pretty much out.
1.17p—I cannot move at all and cannot reach my water. Is breathing voluntary or involuntary? If it's voluntary, I am screwed. I stopped participating in the class 20 minutes ago. Hey, lady! I paid for this frickin class, ok?! You work for me! Stop yelling at everyone and just tell us a story or something. It's like juice and cracker time, ok?
1.20p—It is now 165 degrees and moisture is dripping from the ceiling. The towel that I am laying on is no longer providing any wicking or drying properties. It is actually placing additional sweat on me as I touch it. My towel reeks. I cannot identify the smell but no way can it be from me. Did someone spray some stank on my towel or something?
1.30p—Torture session is over. I wish hateful things upon the instructor. She graciously allows us to stay and 'cool down' in the room. It is 175 degrees. Who cools down in 175 degrees? A Komodo Dragon? My wife has left the room. Probably to throw up.
1.34p—My opportunity to escape has arrived. I roll over to my stomach and press up to my knees. It is warmer as I rise up from ground level - probably by 15 degrees. So let's conservatively say it's 190. I muster my final energy and slowly rise. One foot in front of the other. One foot in front of the other. Towards the door. Towards the door.
1.37p—The temperature in the lobby is 72 degrees. Both nipples stiffen to diamond strength and my penis begins to retract into my abdomen from the 100 degree temp swing. I can once again breathe though so I am pleased. I spot my future ex wife in the lobby. We had such a good thing going but I know that no measure of counseling will be able to unravel the day's turmoil and mental scaring.
1.47p—Arrive at Emerald City Smoothie and proceed to order a 32 oz beverage. 402 calories, 0 fat and 14 grams of protein -- effectively negating any caloric burn or benefit from the last 90 minutes. I finish it in 3 minutes and spend the next 2 hours writing this memoir.
3.47p—Create Craigslist ad while burning final 2 grams of protein from Smoothie and before the "shakes" consume my body.
4.29p—Note to self - check car for missing wet yoga towel in am.
Source
17 day diet- cycle 1, day 7: Weigh in day!
I've been on the 17day diet for one week. I've never been so excited for a weigh in day; I couldn't wait to step on the scale, and see my progress!
Last weeks weight: 190.4
This weeks weight:
I lost 7.4 pounds in one week!
I think the most I've ever lost in one week was 2.5 pounds. So this blew me away! All my hard work is paying off.
I definitely needed this pick me up today. I had a pretty easy first few days on this diet, but Sunday and Monday were downright hard! I had to use every ounce of strength in me to not go off track. I'm proud to say that my only slip up was having half an oreo. Last time I had a whole, double oreo, and this time I only had half, so I'd say I'm improving ;)
10 more days left on the 1st cycle, and then onto the 2nd cycle. It will be so nice to have a change in the things I can eat!
Today's weigh in showed me that hard work and dedication pay off. It has definitely given me the strength I needed to continue to kick butt.
Last weeks weight: 190.4
This weeks weight:
I lost 7.4 pounds in one week!I think the most I've ever lost in one week was 2.5 pounds. So this blew me away! All my hard work is paying off.
I definitely needed this pick me up today. I had a pretty easy first few days on this diet, but Sunday and Monday were downright hard! I had to use every ounce of strength in me to not go off track. I'm proud to say that my only slip up was having half an oreo. Last time I had a whole, double oreo, and this time I only had half, so I'd say I'm improving ;)
10 more days left on the 1st cycle, and then onto the 2nd cycle. It will be so nice to have a change in the things I can eat!
Today's weigh in showed me that hard work and dedication pay off. It has definitely given me the strength I needed to continue to kick butt.
Senin, 05 Desember 2011
Monday
My little sister is about to become a Mother for the first time. Any day now... and I am growing pretty impatient! I want to meet Baby A soooo bad.
My sister S took these incredible pictures of the couple this weekend and I had to post them with her permission. They made me cry with so much happiness because they are truly so beautiful.
Photos by S. Gray
Minggu, 04 Desember 2011
Sunday
Our local YMCA put on a special holiday party today.
Violet sat with Santa again (I think for the 4th or 5th time this season!), met Rudolph and Frosty, had her face painted and made a ton of cute Christmas ornaments. It was a great time!
I signed her up to be a member of the Y finally! It is something I have wanted to do for a long while now. With the help of my Mom (thank you thank you THANK YOU MOM!), she will be taking a youth soccer class in January. I cannot wait! She is going to be the cutest little soccer girl ever.
Violet sat with Santa again (I think for the 4th or 5th time this season!), met Rudolph and Frosty, had her face painted and made a ton of cute Christmas ornaments. It was a great time!
I signed her up to be a member of the Y finally! It is something I have wanted to do for a long while now. With the help of my Mom (thank you thank you THANK YOU MOM!), she will be taking a youth soccer class in January. I cannot wait! She is going to be the cutest little soccer girl ever.
Sabtu, 03 Desember 2011
17 day diet- cycle 1, day 5: I've got some serious willpower
Today I was at the church all day getting ready for our Christmas party.
Since I knew I was going to be there all day, I made sure to eat before I left (egg white omelet, w/ fruit), and I packed a lunch with snacks (Jimmy Johns turkey lettuce wrap for lunch, and fruit for my snack). Coming prepared was the key for staying on track today. If I hadn't brought food with me, by the time the party started, I would have been so starving that I would have pigged out on all the yummy food people brought. And it wouldn't have been pretty.
Coming prepared wasn't the only key to success today. I had to have some willpower like you've never even seen before. This picture shows just a tiny little portion of the delicious desserts people brought:
There were so many desserts there, I had to pinch myself, because I thought I was having one of those dreams again. The kind where I eat 20 cupcakes, with no tummy ache at all. But since it wasn't a dream, I stayed away. I didn't even have a crumb ;)
How do you stay on track at holiday parties?
Since I knew I was going to be there all day, I made sure to eat before I left (egg white omelet, w/ fruit), and I packed a lunch with snacks (Jimmy Johns turkey lettuce wrap for lunch, and fruit for my snack). Coming prepared was the key for staying on track today. If I hadn't brought food with me, by the time the party started, I would have been so starving that I would have pigged out on all the yummy food people brought. And it wouldn't have been pretty.
Coming prepared wasn't the only key to success today. I had to have some willpower like you've never even seen before. This picture shows just a tiny little portion of the delicious desserts people brought:
There were so many desserts there, I had to pinch myself, because I thought I was having one of those dreams again. The kind where I eat 20 cupcakes, with no tummy ache at all. But since it wasn't a dream, I stayed away. I didn't even have a crumb ;)How do you stay on track at holiday parties?
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