Thursday

The last two days (the first two days of Kindergarten) I've felt really really hopeful.

Violet knows her teacher, her friends and has been at her school for several months.

She hasn't exactly been excited to go to Kindergarten but she wasn't upset either.

Today was bad.  The hope I felt was lost.

As I tried to slip away and leave, she grabbed me tightly and wimpered, "Mama please don't leave me here".

I kind of knew the begging was coming by the way she clung to me all morning, this morning.

Maybe I am a dramatic bitch, a wuss, a big baby.  But what she said hurts me.  It hurts every day it happens, which is most days.

I am trying to change my work schedule but nothing has happened yet.  I feel like a failure.  I hope something good happens soon.